There's a joke circulating the internet about a new ice cream called "Baracky Road" that's half chocolate, half vanilla and surrounded by flakes and nuts.
The concept of "Baracky Road" got me thinking about redneck jokes. (I admit it; my mind makes weird connections; must be a right-brain/left-brain thing.) Anyway, you know how redneck jokes start: "You might be a redneck if...." Well I began thinking up endings for "You might be on Baracky Road if...." Here are a few I came up with.
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... there's a taxpayer toll booth every ten feet and an abortion mill on every corner.
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... you see the presidential limo riding behind a tow vehicle pulling a widescreen teleprompter.
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... all the billboards read "Ban Conservative Talk Radio."
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... you pass a Catholic college with a Jesuit standing at the gate holding a "Welcome, Mr. President" sign in one hand and an honorary doctorate degree in the other surrounded by cops in riot gear arresting elderly nuns and priests.
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... you keep having to stop for "gay pride" parades with participants in jock straps and lipstick demonstrating for same sex marriage.
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... every courthouse and church has its religious symbols covered in black crepe.
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... there are homeless folks standing at busy intersections with signs reading "will work for ACORN registering dead people and Disney characters."
Well, I'm starting to run down. What's your Baracky Rd. joke? Bet there are some good possibilities using characters like Bill Ayers, Jeremiah Wright, Barney Frank, and Nancy Pelosi. Have fun and please share!
You know you're on Baracky Road if every crisis looks like a self-promotion opportunity.
ReplyDeleteSee the USA in a government Chevrolet
ReplyDeleteObama is trying to force you to buy
Try to drive your Obamanation Chevrolet through the USA
To Obama America is not the greatest land of All
On a government deteriorated highway or a road along the levy
Performance is creepier everything can beat her
Life is scarier in a government Chevy
So make a date with fate today to see the USA
And try see it in your Obamanation Chevrolet
Traveling Left, and only Traveling Left
Wherever you go the Government Chevy service is a plight at best
Southward or North, near place or far
There’s a government Chevrolet dealer to experiment on your government Chevrolet car
See the USA in an Obamanation government Chevrolet
The Rockies way out West is calling you
Try to drive your government Chevrolet through the USA
Where rotting fields of government subsidized wheat stink oh peew
Whether driving light or whether loads is heavy
Performance is creepier everything can beat her
Life is scarier in a government Chevy
So make a date with fate today to see USA
And try see it in your Obamanation Chevrolet
Lyrics by: Kenneth M. Fisher