Soccer! Soccer!! Soccer!!!

Years ago when our son was about ten, he told me he was going to Doug’s to play.  I said, “OK.”  It wasn’t fifteen minutes later I found him sitting in our family room playing quietly by himself.  I said, “I thought you were going to Doug’s to play?”  He said, “I did, but all they want to do is play soccer, soccer, soccer, and I hate soccer!”  Well put by an avid baseball player who just didn’t get the fascination with a game that appears to be a lot of running around for nothing. 

I must confess up front, I have zero aptitude for sports.  I absolutely hated physical education in school because I was so bad at EVERYTHING except for folk dancing which we devoted six weeks to in middle school.  I wasn’t even good at jumping rope.  I was always among the first to be eliminated in dodge ball.  Jacks and Chinese checkers are more my style.  Any ball bigger than that and I’m a complete failure. 

The rise in interest in soccer amazes me not because I have grown to appreciate the game, but because I’m shocked at how many others have.  Televised games from all around the globe must have something to do with it.   In many places stadiums are filled to the rafters with adoring fans.  In my opinion, any sport that can end more often than not with a score of 1-0 after an hour of running your legs off on a massive field is not worth watching, never mind participating in.  The truth is ANY small child, talented or not, can enjoy having a go at soccer and it has become the game of choice for many parents who want their child to have “an extracurricular activity” on the weekends.  And it is so healthy, don’t you see.  And everyone gets a trophy.  “We are all equal.”

The lesbian on the left and the lesbian on the right are 

engaged.    

Well, my friends, it’s not so healthy anymore for women.  The sport has been taken over and dominated by lesbians with a militant agenda, which is:  We are OUT and PROUD and there’s nothing you or anybody else can do to stop us!

How queer is the game exactly?  This story published by Media Research Center tells how ridiculed one player is because she dares to be Christian.  Another story praises the number of lesbians now participating in the sport. 

After their recent win of the championship of all championships, or whatever it is called, the US team was given a parade in New York City to celebrate.  And did they celebrate bringing home a trophy to the country they love?  Absolutely NOT.  They cursed the president, but then, who doesn’t these days if you are a radical, and they made the whole celebration about what they do with their genitals.  Disgusting!

Adorable or deplorable, you decide

They have vowed to FIGHT for equal pay, even though they don’t do equal work or draw nearly as many fans.  WHATEVER, by golly, they have had enough and THEY AREN’T GOING TO TAKE IT ANYMORE. 

SOCCER WOMEN OF THE WORLD UNITE!

So how many lesbians are there?  The most are Americans and the second most on any one team goes to the Netherlands.  Some say many more actually ARE queer but they are not allowed to be out about it because the countries they represent repress homosexuality.  Boo hiss!  What’s wrong with those people?  Don’t they know this is the modern era?  Where sin is king? 

I only THOUGHT I despised soccer before this recent celebration.  Going forward I may have to pull over and puke every time I see a soccer field, a soccer ball, a soccer player or any mention of it on television. 

I’ll take baseball, apple pie, and the American flag any day over what was never an interesting game in the first place.  Call me old fashioned, but I think little girls would be far better off to avoid sports all together these days and focus more on things like learning to sew and playing with baby dolls or learning to cook.  I don’t think the world has actually changed so much that real men find muscular toned up women more attractive than the ones who understand we are not, in fact, equal at all.