On Modesty

This post was inspired by one at Creative Minority Report about "America's next top role model." I recommend it.

Modesty is something most people don't think about. If an outfit is considered fashionable, they wear it. A few years ago I had a conversation with a young adult about her clothing. She was on the way to Mass by the way. But she was wearing ripped jeans, the kind you buy that are pre-ripped. I mean the kind you pay big bucks for that are ripped and shredded and look like they were retrieved from a trash can at the Salvation Army. But the pricetag is usually hefty. Go figure!

My comment to the young lady was, "I honestly don't understand that fashion statement." She looked back at me in my skirt and jacket, stockings and heels and replied, a little snippily, "I don't understand your fashion statement either." Now this young person happens to be someone I love very much. If she had been a stranger I wouldn't have said anything. Why should a stranger care about my opinion? But I truly don't understand someone I thought had common sense, being taken in by a fashion industry that sells clothing that would likely be rejected by a hobo (except kids dressing up for Halloween). I wonder if she would blacken her face with burnt cork if Revlon sold it as the latest look.

Generally when I talk about modesty I'm referring to clothing that is too revealing or provocative. And that certainly is a more serious issue. When clothing draws attention to a woman's breasts or her crotch there is clearly a sexual message that can be a temptation and occasion of sin to young men. The same for men in tight jeans and speedo swim suits. If little is left to the imagination, the clothing is immodest. What is its purpose except an invitation to lust. It's also unappealing to see someone, man or woman, bend over and show a bare buttox. We used to have a standing joke at our house about the "dishwasher repair man" whose low slung pants covered little when he bent over. And women's hip-hugging, low slung jeans make many look like dishwasher apprentices.

But there is something also immodest about ripped and shredded clothing especially when the holes and tears are positioned to draw attention to the upper thighs.

Which brings me to the question of exactly what is modesty? It's more than avoiding too much cleavage. It's also about not drawing attention to oneself by bizarre and outrageous clothing, tattoos, spiked purple hair, body piercings, etc. Modesty doesn't thrust itself into the limelight or demand attention. It doesn't have a loud and shrill voice. Modesty is the companion of humility and the guardian of chastity. It's a beautiful virtue that is too little evident in our vain and hedonistic culture.

Modesty doesn't refuse to engage the other in conversation, but speaks gently and never uses vulgarity. Modesty never swears or curses. Modesty has clean eyes, those eyes which are the windows of the soul. And all the clothing and jewelry and makeup is selected to draw attention to those windows and give the other a glimpse into the sanctuary within. Modesty is one of the most unappreciated and unpracticed of the virtues, but what a blessing it is to the one who discovers or rediscovers it.