Who Am I? Who Are You?

Did you ever take one of those personality tests? Please Understand Me was all the rage back in the 80s and 90s. It identified four character traits (eight really) with a possibility of 16 types. This was the breakdown:

• E or I (Extraversion vs. Introversion)
• N or S (INtuition vs. Sensation)
• T or F (Thinking vs. Feeling)
• J or P (Judging vs. Perceiving)

When I was on the parish council at St. Louis in Alexandria, the pastor wanted us all to take the test. I think I came out as an ENFJ, although, if I remember correctly the N and S and the T and F were pretty close. But I'm definitely an extrovert and I like closure, so the J was accurate as well. That put me at odds with the pastor who came out with the same letters except he was a P. He was also a liberal so clashes between us were inevitable. But one of the most frustrating things was that he seemed never to care whether the council decided anything or not. We talked a lot at the meetings (yadda yadda), but rarely decided anything. 

I remember one evening when everyone but me was trashing Cardinal Ratzinger. (That was in the days before he became pope.) I finally piped up quietly. "Gosh, I kind of like Cardinal Ratzinger." The room went quiet and they changed the subject. I was post cancer at that point and doing chemotherapy so I ended up quitting because it just added to my stress level. Who needs that?

Father was definitely a process man, always on a journey with no destination. Perhaps that's why he ended up leaving the priesthood to a marry a woman with whom I used to carpool. He was apparently still perceiving his vocation in middle age. I still pray for him and my neighbor. She was very kind to me during my cancer.

Back to the subject.

I've always been interested in the four temperaments as described in classic literature: 

In 450 b.c., Hippocrates described four such dispositions he called temperaments-a choleric temperament with an ease of emotional arousal and sensitivity; a phlegmatic temperament with cool detachment and impassivity; a melancholic temperament with a very serious, dour, and downcast nature; and a sanguine temperament full of impulsivity, excitability, and quick reactivity. [Source]

My own temperament is choleric/melancholic which is rather odd since I'm a cheerful person, a gift from my always smiling and cheerful mother. (Thanks, Mom!)  Every temperament has its gifts and its temptations.

The choleric, a Crusader Rabbit type, tends to go off half-cocked and wants to hurry up about making decisions. The choleric often dictates to others about the "right" conclusion and tends to be opinionated and strong-willed. Look for the fool who rushes in where angels fear to tread and you're likely to find a choleric. A big temptation for the choleric is pride. The challenge is to slow down, act more prudently, appreciate the views of others, and foster the virtue of humility. The positive side of cholerics is that they tend to have plenty of energy and, if their moral compass is right, they aim to do God's will and eagerly engage in apostolic works, sometimes without stopping enough to pray. Many of the saints who founded religious orders, opened hospitals and schools, and were untiringly zealous in doing good were likely choleric personalities. 

The phlegmatic, on the other hand, is slow to act and is less emotionally involved in things. The challenge for that personality is to ignore things and let the chips fall where they may. On the other hand, the phlegmatic is more prudent and thinks before acting sometimes thinking ad infinitum. He's deliberative and generally sober in his judgments, but it's a temptation to be lazy and choose the easy way that requires less work. 

If you brood over past wrongs and have a hard time letting go of them, you are likely a melancholic. I dreamed for years, even up to middle age and beyond, about negative things that happened during my childhood and in adolescence. The temptation for the melancholic is to remember all the bad things in life and to bear grudges and nurse resentments against those who've hurt them. The positive side of the melancholics are that they tend to be sensitive to others.  

The sanguine personality is happy go lucky and tends to follow the feeling of the moment so today's impression often gives way to a different one tomorrow. He's often a party animal so overindulgence in food and drink is a temptation as well as being a flatterer who's insincere. On the plus side, he's an optimist with a positive outlook and lives very much in the present. He doesn't brood over the past or worry about the future. He's a friendly extrovert who converses easily even with strangers. At the same time, however, he tends to be superficial so his decisions are often wrong from lack of depth.  One temptation for the sanguine person is to flatter others and be insincere. He's also indecisive and needs to resist the tendency to flit from one thing to another.

I doubt if anyone is a pure type. We are all a combination of the different temperaments. But knowing what our strongest tendencies are can help us to know ourselves and follow a plan of life that lets us build on our strengths to grow in virtue and resist the temptations that lead to sin. 

I recommend the little booklet, The 4 Temperaments, by Rev. Conrad Hock. It was originally published in 1934 and revised and expanded in 1962 by Rev. Nicholas Wilwers. I wish I'd had this when I was raising my children. They make me think of a garden with all kinds of flowers that need different tending to thrive. This booklet would have been a real help in cultivating the little gardens of their souls.