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Thursday, February 15, 2024

Thinking about penance and almsgiving! Charity is better than giving up chocolate!

Meet Fifi LaFoo!
This Lent I'm thinking about penance and almsgiving in a new way. After a homily last Sunday about the Lent's focus being about charity not suffering, I've decided to do penance and almsgiving a little differently. I will still be avoiding sweets and between meal snacks (I'm not much of a snacker anyway.), but I will focus on acts of charity. Sometimes those are harder than skipping the glass of wine or the chocolate bar. And giving up your time to serve someone difficult can certainly be a penance.

Almsgiving is taking on a different look too. Mother Teresa used to talk about the loneliness of many souls and their need for love. I've mentioned my sister, Jeanne, before who is in deteriorating health in a nursing home in Frederick, MD. It's a round trip of over three hours to travel from the Valley for a visit. And I confess, I'm not one of those folks who loves to hop in the car and take a drive. Nevertheless, my husband and I have embraced that trip for Lent increasing our visits from about once a month to once a week instead. We pray several rosaries which makes the trip fulfill all three Lenten practices. It's not an easy visit since my sister is depressed and often hostile and angry. It shows in her treatment of both family and staff. And I confess that I have often let Jeanne's mood and ill treatment infect me with resentment and impatience. Mea culpa. That's when I need to remember that feelings need to be under the control of the intellect and the will, something with which I've struggled all my life.

By the grace of God, I'm trying to let go of Jeanne's hostility and treat her with as much love and kindness as possible. When she says, "You can go; get out of here!" I smile and stay. I brought a puppet when I visited yesterday. She told me I was crazy. Next time I think I'll bring two. I have a raccoon in a trash can who is very funny. I'll try to get a smile out of her. I actually managed to get one or two yesterday.

My other focus this Lent is to pray every day for the poor souls in Purgatory. This morning I read Fr. James Buckley's little pamphlet on Purgatory. He quoted one of my favorite saints, Francis de Sales after writing that we have a "deplorable tendency to forget about the dead." St. Francis put it well when he said, "We do not sufficiently remember our dear departed; their memory seems to perish with the sound of the funeral bells." Father points out that tear and vain feelings that our loved ones are in heaven are useless to them if they're in Purgatory. Prayers and Masses are what they desperately need. 

So that's my other work for Lent. I hope when Easter comes there will be many souls released from Purgatory and enjoying the Beatific Vision. Please, dear souls, pray for me before the throne of God.

May this Lent be a blessing to all who enter into it with a grateful heart for all the Lord has done for us. 

Please pray for my sister Jeanne.


14 comments:

  1. "After a homily last Sunday about the Lent's focus being about charity not suffering" This sounds like one of those false VC2 dichotomies to me--one that could never pass by us except that we stopped calling our central act of worship "The Holy Sacrifice of the Mass" in favor of "the liturgy" etc. St. Paul states: "Love is Patient (suffering). For my Lenten reading I picked up in the basement Library of St. Hilary (Baltimore) "The Eucharist" by Alphonsus Ligouri and because of the epistle of Quinquagesima: "Love is Patient etc." saw that in the table of contents and turned there--just quoting one thing here: "in a letter he (a priest) wrote to one of his penitents to encourage her to suffer gave her these words to keep inscribed at the bottom of her crucifix: 'Tis thus one loves.'" [this book appears excellent]

    https://archive.org/details/alphonsusworks06alfouoft/page/n9/mode/2up

    Other book I picked up was Volume II of "Practice of Perfection and Christian Virtues" by Alphonsus Rodriguez (I just finished Volume I). My volume starts w/The Ninth Treatise on Mortification which begins "It is GOOD to join prayer to fasting," said the angel Raphael to Toby..." and goes on to quote Canticles, "ascends by... myrrh and incense" and the same thing as Ligouri -- prayer is not enough must be joined to patiently suffering in this life and even loving and seeking out suffering to provide graces / cover the sins of others in imitation of Christ.
    https://archive.org/details/PPCV-Manresa/page/n583/mode/2up

    Since you are praying for souls, might be interested in these search results:
    https://www.google.com/search?q=saints+who+offered+to+suffer+for+the+souls+in+purgatory&rlz=1C1ONGR_enUS1066US1067&oq=saints+who+offered+to+suffer+for+the+souls+in+purgatory&gs_lcrp=EgZjaHJvbWUyBggAEEUYOdIBCjEwMTAwajBqMTWoAgCwAgA&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

    When my father was struggling to walk up the stairs in CHF my mother one day started singing with a catch in her voice, "Every step leads higher higher." I was pretty amazed. Another woman who just passed away said that when her mother was in the nursing home for seven years pretty much paralyzed she would tell her when she became depressed and wanting to go home that look what God had given them to offer up which would make her mother smile as tears rolled down her cheeks. It is such a pity that we have lost this belief in the efficacy of suffering and the necessity to patiently bear our crosses in order to merit heaven. We somehow believe that we are good and as such should not have to suffer and that somehow love/charity is different than suffering patiently and helping others to patiently bear their sufferings. We believe we are good and don't need Lent to make reparation for our sins and if not our sins than those of others. I was telling my sister that I spent my life not paying attention to tithing and from the ages of 21 to 51 I was in the novus ordo -- so never fasted during Lent -- and spent most of those years in mortal sin making no effort to get out of it since all confessors ever said (most said nothing) was to ask if I thought it was a sin and pursuing as much pleasure and avoiding as much suffering as possible while going to 'the liturgy' every Sunday. Anything I give to God now is the dregs of my life. I would not tell anyone not to fast during Lent to the extent possible (should feel some hunger) or not to spend the time examining one's life/conscience (trying to see ourselves in the eyes of God), working up as much sorrow/contrition as possible and doing as much penance and as you say, acts of charity, as is possible. While we think we are so good, it is an inescapable fact that we are Ninevites and Sodomites (live in sodom and nineveh) and this could be OUR last Lent.

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  2. I had to laugh when I read your comment because I was at a TLM with a very orthodox priest. The point he was making is that Lent is not about seeing how much we can suffer so God will approve of us, but to see how much more charitable we can become during Lent to imitate the charity of Christ. After all, as St. Paul says, the only thing that will remain in the end is charity. Besides, doing charity often involves suffering. A priest friend of mine posted something about giving up things but continuing to hold grudges, neglect your obligations, etc. then you are kidding yourself. Amen to that. Do charity until it hurts. Sometimes the people we help are a tremendous cross of suffering for us. That was the message of Father's homily. It's not about the chocolate!

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    1. A traditional priest I know said a very similar thing that Lent is about growing in the love of God and, while it is true that one can give one's body to be burned and if don't have charity it profits nothing, nevertheless, even the animals in Nineveh were fasting for 40 days. Why did Jesus, Himself, fast for 40 days? I think we are only fooling ourselves that we are performing acts of charity while evading fasting and even giving up dessert. Every day we blog/read about the corruption in the church. Every day our country and world get worse and worse. Abortion in the state constitution. Assisted suicide. Blessing of couples living in sodomy, adultery and fornication. Everyone says they are "praying," but Jesus talks about how we should fast and give alms. I think the three go together and think a lot of people will find that Jesus says to them, you gave alms out of your excess. You never fasted in your life. I think there's more to praying than just putting your lips together and blowing. How serious are we about having prayer answered if we are unwilling to fast and give alms (not pretend made up alms, but 20/30% of our income like St Joachim and St. Anne; Zacheus gave half ). I think that you have to do works of charity (like visit your sister in the nursing home) and fast and give alms also--but I think you gain the strength to do those works and more thru prayer, fasting and alms giving. The prophetess Anna was fasting when she was 84: "And she was a widow until fourscore and four years; who departed not from the temple, by fastings and prayers serving night and day." It's hard to know why Jesus and everyone in the Bible were doing it, but now we rich, carnal/carnivorous sodomites and ninevites can be charitable and pleasing to God while stuffing our mouths with chocolate bars and wine during Lent.

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    2. He didn't say not to fast. Just because someone emphasizes works of charity doesn't mean he's discouraging fasting. Our priests talk about all three. And judging from the looks of all the priests we see from the SSPX, they take fasting seriously. We try to do the Lenten one main meal and two smaller that don't equal a full meal even though we are well over the age of the fasting requirement.

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    3. Still would say there is a phrasing difficulty w/being about charity and not suffering-and it could be your rephrasing of the message. One willingly suffers for what one loves/wants (like a worldly gold medal/crown/house/car). The thing about fasting is that it seems some type of requirement/thing you're supposed to do when you want God's attention. Isaiah 58 says the reason I have not heard you when you fast is that you continue to do wickedness. Apparently you have to do works of charity (follow the commandments), give alms (take care of the poor and suffering), pray AND fast. In Sermon on the Mount Matthew 6:16, Jesus says WHEN (not IF or go ahead and substitute something positive) you fast. I used to think I understood, don't be a hypocrite, but then I was like WHEN did I fast? WHEN did I give alms? https://biblehub.com/matthew/6-16.htm

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    4. In the collect for 1st Sunday of Lent (pre-1962 (could be same 1962 (?)): "Oh God, who dost PURIFY Thy Church by the yearly observance of Lent: grant to Thy household, that what we strive to obtain by Thee from abstinence, we may obtain by good works. Through our Lord, Jesus Christ..." The introductory blurb states: "let us prepare ourselves by fast, prayers, and works of charity for the solemn Feast of Easter." If you look up fasting and purification, mainly health to purify the body and Ramadan/Muslim to purify the body.
      Before he revised the sacraments, Paul VI revised penance in the church, in 1966. Like Fiducia Supplicans, it restates Church teaching, including: "Therefore, following the Master, every Christian must renounce himself, take up his own cross and participate in the sufferings of Christ...He will also have to live for his brethren, completing "in his flesh that which is lacking in the sufferings of Christ...for in the benefit of his body, which is the church."(41)...although the duty of doing penance is motivated above all by participation in the sufferings of Christ" only to conclude by wiping away all the fasting in the Catholic Church to two days of Lent: the first (Ash Wednesday) and Good Friday.
      https://www.vatican.va/content/paul-vi/en/apost_constitutions/documents/hf_p-vi_apc_19660217_paenitemini.html

      In the pre-1956 missal I have saved by my father which belonged to his sister, it states re: "Fast & Abstinence: In US of N America: Fast & Abstinence are prescribed in the US on the WEDNESDAYS and Fridays of Lent and Holy Saturday forenoon (on all other days of Lent fasting alone is prescribed and meat is allowed once a day;) the Ember Days, viz the Wed, Fri & Sat following the 1st Sunday of Lent, Pentecost, the 14th of September, and the 3rd Sunday of Advent; the Vigils of Pentecost, Assumption, All Saints and Christmas [I think this was changed to vigil of Immaculate Conception vs Assumption]. No fast or abstinence if vigil falls on Sunday....dispensation may be granted by local bishops to the LABORING classes and their families on all days of Lent and abstinence, except Fridays, Ash Wed, Holy Saturday forenoon and the vigil of Christmas. "

      While many complain about the corruption, the mock mass, the mock priests, the mock sacraments and now the mock blessings, not many complaints about the mock penitence we've been practicing since 1966. I would add Pius XII revised the communion fast in 1957 (right after the 1956 changes to Holy Week) and Paul VI reduced the fast to the mock 1 hour which begins with the start of mass. [I used to bring dunkin donuts to the nursing home when I visited my aunts on Sunday and sit around w/the residents in their community room scarfing them down before we went to watch mass in the tv room. One day, the aunt w/the missal asked me what about the one hour fast and I assured her oh mass takes an hour.)
      https://www.ewtn.com/catholicism/library/fasting-before-mass-4584
      Know the law says no longer need fast once 60, but may be easier for us having reduced state in life duties.

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  3. Ms K:

    A friend just died this morning. Great guy. We plan to make a rosary pilgrimage tonight for the repose of his soul during which we will remember your sister's intentions also.

    God bless

    Richard W Comerford

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  4. Thanks, Richard. Much appreciated. Did you say in the past that you go to the Shrine of Our Lady of La Salette? We visited the shrine in Kenosha a few years ago. Is that where you live?

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  5. What's your friend's name. We'll offer our rosary for him today.

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    1. Ms K

      John.

      Thank you very much.

      God bless

      Richard W Comerford

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  6. Another good work of charity is replying politely to commenters who either didn't read your post, or just didn't understand. You are very polite with your responses and much more charitable than I in this regard.

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  7. When reading your Francis quote "We do not sufficiently remember our dear departed; their memory seems to perish with the sound of the funeral bells."

    I realized Roman Cathokic views on purgatory came from pre-Christian Roman views of the manes. Although had I not read in an old book on British customs last night that it was believed in ancient times that the manes wondered the earth on Feb 14th I would not have been able to make this connection because I would have forgotten about the manes entirely.

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  8. Thank you for your kind comment, Mary Kay.

    Romulus, the Catholic Church's position on Purgatory is definitely pre-Christian since praying for the dead is discussed numerous times in the Old Testament, especially in the Book of Wisdom and Maccabees. I know nothing about "the manes" and never heard of it before.

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  9. Probable refers to this: https://www.worldhistory.org/article/34/roman-household-spirits-manes-panes-and-lares/

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