Of Church Militant's Red Alerts and their "RETREATS" -- Ya Just Gotta Laugh!

Church Militant (CM) is putting out "red alerts" every day. Why? 

Duh! Because they want your money, of course. 

Hey! "Nobody impacts the intersection of the Church and the world like Church Militant!" Just ask them. 

I agree. Nobody exhibits a more uncharitable, aggressive, and nasty zeal than they do whether they target "the Church" or "the world." 

And to keep up that aggressive zeal and their attacks on the SSPX (and everybody else), they need $500,000 before the end of the year. So open up your wallet and let Michael and company help themselves to the contents. After all, you can't expect Terry Carroll to give $300,000 every year.

 

And, hey, you get a lot for your money. Just ask them. They give you 63 reasons in their "red alert" message for supporting Church Militant (Count 'em and correct me if I'm wrong!), interspersed, of course, with donate buttons. Click! Click! Click!... Oops, one more...Click!

Here are a few bullets from their list:

• Most trusted Catholic news/media on earth [Really? Proof please. Only someone with incredible hubris could make such a claim! But maybe it's their brand of humor like Rush saying, "talent on loan from God." Hmmm....Do Mike Voris and his staff even have a sense of humor?]
• Biggest religious/political resource for other media (Catholic and secular) [Really? How'd they figure that one out? Hey! Who cares if it's true or not!]
• CM is the leader in news, politics and religion [LOL! Really... "THE" leader? The one and only, first in line leader. Is that in the U.S. or the entire world?... or the universe?]
• Led by experienced, Emmy-award-winning journalist/reporter/ anchor [and SSPX hater who considers himself qualified to declare the SSPX schismatic and label their supporters pedo-enablers, cult members, and ignorant fools. But then, Michael and company are not admirers of the Mass of the Fathers and Doctors of the Church that those ignorant "rad-trads" adhere to.] 

You can read the other 59 reasons to donate to CM if you're so inclined. Many of them are debatable including the reliability of their investigative reports, but don't question CM unless you relish the threat of a lawsuit. After all, they defeated the city of Baltimore [One of their bullets is "prevailed in federal court," presumably referring to the Baltimore fight, which qualifies them as a global force to be reckoned with...well... at least a national force.)] 

Oh...and every Catholic will be relieved to know that their spies are on the lookout for schism and heresy which, CM tells us, includes "infiltration of diocesan councils." [Those evil bishops better watch out. They are likely on hidden cameras.]

But what really should make you donate to CM is that you too can attend a retreat during the holiest days of the year, the Easter Triduum, where Michael Voris as retreat master will give nine talks and several question/answer sessions for your spiritual growth.  

Unfortunately he can't offer Mass or hear your confession. [CM will, however, offer novus ordo Masses on their Easter "retreat" with a sprinkle of Latin as described in a footnote - "*Mass will be celebrated in the Novus Ordo form (reverent; ad orientem; some prayers in Latin.)"] What a relief! Be assured there will be a priest or two in the background to offer Mass and Confession and maybe give a few brief words of wisdom during the homily to magnify Michael's. Maybe CM will even have a few celebrity priests to help draw the crowd. [Somehow, I don't think Bishop Athanasius Schneider will be there as he was at the Catholic Identity Conference in October offering a pontifical high Mass in the extraordinary form. Goodness, he must be one of those rad-trads stuck in the past.]

Do you really want to attend Easter Mass, the holiest day of the year
at the Embassy Suites hotel in Dallas? Really? Call me. I know a good shrink.

Which brings me to the description of a friend who has attended cruises with both Church Militant and the Media Research Center as well as attending The Remnant's Catholic Identity Conference last October. Before you plunk down your thousands on the Voris "retreat" listen to her experience:

We have been on two cruises with Brent Bozell [Media Research Center] and a number of his invited celebrity guests, who truly are celebrities, such as Jason Chaffich, Allen West, Cal Thomas, Joe Piscapo, and Steve Moore. And one of the Duck Dynasty TV show family, the founder of the Disney Channel, Charlie Kirk, and others I can't recall, but you would recognize if you saw them on TV. Each day our schedule included panel discussions with open Q & A from the audience. Some sessions were one on one interviews with a star and Brent. At dinner each night our table assignment rotated to a different table "hosted" by one of the celebrities that you had to yourself at table for 8 throughout dinner.

Days we were in port, these people were on our tour buses going where we were going. You could sit next to them, talk to them, laugh with them, like friends. And get to know their spouses. Loads of fun. And there were private group cocktail parties on the ship a couple of times before dinner. All the celeb guests attended that you could have more time to chat them up if you wanted to. None of them ever shied away from a conversation. They all acted happy to get to know you and talk to you about anything you wanted to talk about. It was all so relaxed. I don't think any of them felt abused or taken advantage of and I didn't see any guest being a pest and hogging their time either.

We all wore name badges that said MRC and they knew we were part of the group they were basically there to entertain and be nice to.

In contrast, I've seen other celebs in my life on stage, Yul Brenner in King and I, Richard Burton at Lincoln Center NYC in Camelot, Elvis Presley (twice actually), Peter Paul and Mary at Wolf Trap among others and you always know they are "special" and unaccessible. They work for you to earn the cost of the ticket you bought to see them, but you don't get any closer to them than the audience to the stage.

Now to describe Voris and entourage. I would say he was as off limits to all the people in his private cruise group as the "on stage celebs" even though we were a very small group with name badges that should have afforded us access to his polite company if we wanted to chat. He never was seen in the dining rooms except at his own table with members of his staff. In other words just a little too good to mix with the rest of us or actually get to know us. Never strolled by our tables to say hello. Kept to himself under watchful eye of his "handlers," who did keep him on time and at the right place at least.

After dinner he was available to answer questions in a small conference room for about 30-40 minutes but we only did that once. I preferred a drink in the bar with another couple we had met and are still friends with. I thought his lectures were well prepared and enjoyable and going to all the California mission churches for mass in ports was very nice and had it not been for the cruise we would never have seen them. But the elevation of his status and separation was so unnecessary and, while they may have thought it was what guests were seeking, it was actually off-putting since I thought I was treated like a nobody. The women (Niles and another one who may have just been one of the travel agents) were the worst. They were actually rude and did their best, it seemed, to avoid us.

I can't imagine why people go year after year, unless they are groupies, because there are a lot of other wonderful cruises to choose from. Or let's hope there are after Covid.

The speakers at the CIC (Catholic Identity Conference) were not hard to approach, even Bishop Schneider, who actually IS a big deal person. I don't know if Voris is the one creating his image or if he's just the personality on the package that someone else creates. I also thought he was too skinny for a normal male and his hair was totally outrageous for a guy who wants to be taken seriously in the Catholic world. 

Please! Can my friend really question the seriousness of Michael and CM? They have "65 full-time employees!!" They have "state-of-the-art production and technology equipment!!" they have "leading edge production values" (whatever they are)!! How can anyone question the seriousness of "Dear Leader?"

Well...let me get serious myself for a minute. What inspired this post was something I read this morning in Soul of the Apostolate, by Dom Jean-Baptiste Chautard. It was a quote by the monk, historian, and Doctor of the Church, St. Bede, who wrote, "The Savior calls the flock of the elect little either by comparison with the multitude of the reprobate, or, better still, because of their great zeal for humility, for no matter how great and extensive His Church may have become, He wills that she should ever grow in humility right up to the end of the world, and thus arrive at the Kingdom promised to the humble." 

Dom Chautard goes on to describe the temptation of the apostle to "overweening pride" from works that "bring into play his pride, his touchiness, his Ego....[including] a purely human desire to get ahead of everybody else...a worldly spirit of partisanship, great harshness in defending his principles, and so on....The glory of God, instead of remaining the true end...will be reduced, by such an apostle as we are describing, to the level of a pretext and a means of supporting and encouraging and excusing his passions in all that is weakest and most human about them."

As I read this section, CM and Michael Voris came to mind and their relentless attacks on other Catholic media and their claim to be the authentic voice of Catholicism as they sue and threaten to sue other Catholic media and even little nobody bloggers like Susan and me. 

Voris talks a lot about the Church of Nice, but I think it's accurate to call his advocacy NuChurch or, if you prefer, NOChurch, because there is obviously no Church outside the novus ordo Church for Michael and company. 

It is a sad thing when Catholics fight with one another, but the fact is, that's exactly where the battle is fiercest. Voris and the CM crowd appear eager to eliminate Catholic rivals rather than work with them. They ridicule The Remnant for trying "unite the clans" and go after LifeSiteNews for organizing petitions. But what is their real reason for attack? Do they lust after the donations given to those groups when they could go into CM's coffers?

Go to their page and look at all the requests for money plus: the gimmicks and gadgets, their relentless promotion of "premium access?" The T-shirts, the calendars, the games, Milo's rendition of psalms and proverbs, real estate links, the ads ("And remember Church Militant for your end of year donations."), etc. ad nauseum. 

Oh...and don't forget the hundreds of thousands they took from the government for COVID relief when restaurants and small business were closing their doors in bankruptcy and were given nothing!

What you do with your Christmas donations is up to you, but giving to CM just feeds an ego-driven "apostolate" that, in my opinion, uses the faith as a "pretext and means of supporting and excusing" the passions of the CM team, especially the three principles: Michael Voris, Christine Niles, and Simon Rafe. 

I will offer rosaries and prayers for CM, but gave up supporting them several years ago as they became ever-more vicious in their attacks on other Catholic groups, especially the SSPX and lay groups that defend the Latin Mass and Holy Tradition. I believe they are like the Sanhedrin that attempted to squash the newborn Pentecostal Church. CM would happily do that to the SSPX if they could. It won't happen because it's of God. But CM gives it the old college try!

In the meantime, my husband and I are sending our Christmas checks to LifeSiteNews, the Poor Clares, Aid to the Church in Need, and other truly authentic Catholic groups that act in charity and love. Church Malevolent, (as Ben Carter, the Brit who exhibits his "schoolboy humor" about Michael Virus and the Latex, labels them), will not be one of them!