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Sunday, June 29, 2025

Sunday Meditation: Love is not rude!

Regular readers know that I like the Epoch Times -- a lot! The June 17-24 issue had a great article on The Steep Price of Declining Civility. I think most would agree that we see that almost every day, the behavior on social media being a good example. Rudeness is just the tip of the iceberg, though. The riots in our cities, school shootings, assassinations of political figures -- they all show the "steep price" of a culture entering chaos!

Webster defines civility as "civilized conduct, courtesy, politeness." Defining a word by using a variant of it doesn't seem to be much help so I looked up civilized:

  • Having a highly developed society and culture.
  • Showing evidence of moral and intellectual advancement; humane, ethical, and reasonable.
  • Marked by refinement in taste and manners; cultured.

Sometimes it helps to look up the opposite word as well, so I checked out uncivilized:

  • Not civilized; barbarous.
  • Not civilized; not reclaimed from savage life; rude; barbarous; savage.
  • Not civil; coarse; clownish.

Well that helps. Being civilized is obviously a positive trait and being uncivilized is a negative one. Unfortunately that hasn't kept a large number of people from becoming savage barbarians who are filled with zeal for rioting, committing arson, physically attacking those with whom they disagree, etc. I think of two elderly pro-life men assaulted in Baltimore and seriously injured for daring to stand on the sidewalk and offer help to women entering an abortion business. Their attacker was a barbarous savage. He certainly showed no "evidence of moral and intellectual advancement." Unfortunately, his ilk is becoming more and more common in our culture as the increasingly common riots in our cities indicates.

As has often been said, you can't legislate morality. The article quoted several historical figures on the subject. Benjamin Franklin once said, "Only a a virtuous people are capable of freedom. As nations become corrupt and vicious, they have more need of masters." Like a brutal, biting dog who must be chained, our corrupt and vicious barbarians must be restrained by law enforcement and the courts. Unfortunately, some of the barbarians wear judges' robes.

Another political voice, Edmund Burke, wrote, "Men are qualified for civil liberty in the exact proportion to their disposition to put moral chains upon their own appetites." I wonder what percentage of the population is controlled by their vices, the seven deadly sins.

My favorite quote came from a 19th century English mathematician who was also a judge, John Fletcher Moulton. Moulton believed that "the real greatness of a nation, its true civilization" is found in obedience; but obedience to what? The life of virtue. 

The Roman Republic has a lot to teach us. In its early days, life was governed by a commitment to virtue.

Roman virtues were central to the identity of Roman citizens and served as guiding principles for behavior. Some of the key virtues include:
  • Virtus: Often translated as “virtue,” this term encompassed qualities like bravery, valor, and excellence, particularly in military contexts.
  • Pietas: This virtue emphasized duty to the gods, country, and family, signifying a sense of responsibility and loyalty.
  • Fides: Representing faithfulness and trustworthiness, fides was essential in both personal relationships and public life.
  • Gravitas: This virtue denoted seriousness and dignity, reflecting the importance of maintaining a respectful demeanor in all aspects of life.
These virtues were not merely abstract concepts; they were deeply embedded in Roman culture and daily life, influencing the conduct of individuals and the functioning of society. [Source]

Today an ethical Roman pagan would put many so-called Christians to shame. St. Paul describes for us the nature of love. "Love is patient, Love is kind,... love is not rude." Courtesy and civility are the grease that make the gears of a society run smoothly. We can't, of course, force a change in the behavior of others, but we can give witness to a different way.

When I was in jail with another pro-lifer for four days in Arlington following conviction for an abortion center rescue, we were placed in a cellblock with six other women. When we arrived they were all cursing and swearing. My colleague and I didn't correct them, we simply smiled and answered their questions about why we were in jail. We explained about defending the babies. At mealtime the trays came with no napkins. My friend and I got paper towels and distributed them to the other ladies. We later played basketball with them during the brief exercise time. Within a few hours, no one was cursing any more. It was an interesting experience.

Courtesy and civility begin with each one of us. How do we treat people on Facebook or Instagram? Do we smile at strangers? Do we drive aggressively? Do we say, "Excuse me!" if we bump into someone? Do we leave snide and insulting comments on blogs presuming to know the motivation of others and accusing them of hate? Do we hold the door for people? Do we ever think about how we want to be treated and pledge to treat others, even those with whom we disagree, in the same way? 

The song, "Let There Be Peace on Earth" makes a spot on point when it says, "Let Peace Begin with Me." Each of us can strive to make courtesy and civility our modus operandi. If we do we can change our own little corner of the world beginning in our own families.


May God pour out the Holy Spirit upon us that we may reflect all His gifts and fruits. and magnify God's name in all the earth.

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to Thee.

2 comments:

  1. Douay Rheims "Charity is patient, is kind: charity envieth not, dealeth not perversely;" Does not say "is not rude." Jesus was rude to the Pharisees calling them hypocrites and vipers (maybe John the Baptist said cipers). Now "rude" has probably changed meanings since the 1600s as back then it might have meant pervy, and yet the translators didn't use the word rude. Neither does the KJV. Changing it to say "is not rude" is a liw from modern political correctness.

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  2. I often think that we Catholics will be repeating what early saints/missionaries did in going out among the savages/barbarians to spread the Gospel and convert. Only it will be at home not some foreign land.

    "I wonder what percentage of the population is controlled by their vices, the seven deadly sins." I reluctantly speculate that it's many who are seemingly "regular" folks who are our neighbors, friends & family. If "everyone" is doing it then it looks normal.

    I also think a lot of this "empowerment " talk seems to be an excuse to be rude and uncaring rather than understanding and charitable. Instead of learning to get along there's seems to be an aggressive push towards cutting people off from friendships or family. And there seems to be a double standard. You must accept me or I'm cutting you out of my life. But I don't have to accept you so I'm cutting you out of my life. There's no mutual give & take in a courteous way. It's my way or I go nuclear on you.

    What is sad and frustrating is how many people who I know who consider themselves followers of Christ yet don't actually treat people like they are. A lot of them make fun of the left leaning and their over reliance on their feelings BUT these people are doing the same thing! They're rude & nasty to others because they're "right" and the others deserve it-- all based on their feelings of course!

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