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Monday, June 29, 2009
You'll know you're on Baracky Road if...
There's a joke circulating the internet about a new ice cream called "Baracky Road" that's half chocolate, half vanilla and surrounded by flakes and nuts.
The concept of "Baracky Road" got me thinking about redneck jokes. (I admit it; my mind makes weird connections; must be a right-brain/left-brain thing.) Anyway, you know how redneck jokes start: "You might be a redneck if...." Well I began thinking up endings for "You might be on Baracky Road if...." Here are a few I came up with.
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... there's a taxpayer toll booth every ten feet and an abortion mill on every corner.
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... you see the presidential limo riding behind a tow vehicle pulling a widescreen teleprompter.
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... all the billboards read "Ban Conservative Talk Radio."
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... you pass a Catholic college with a Jesuit standing at the gate holding a "Welcome, Mr. President" sign in one hand and an honorary doctorate degree in the other surrounded by cops in riot gear arresting elderly nuns and priests.
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... you keep having to stop for "gay pride" parades with participants in jock straps and lipstick demonstrating for same sex marriage.
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... every courthouse and church has its religious symbols covered in black crepe.
You might be on Baracky Rd. if... there are homeless folks standing at busy intersections with signs reading "will work for ACORN registering dead people and Disney characters."
Well, I'm starting to run down. What's your Baracky Rd. joke? Bet there are some good possibilities using characters like Bill Ayers, Jeremiah Wright, Barney Frank, and Nancy Pelosi. Have fun and please share!