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Saturday, December 26, 2015

My First Nomination for the 2015 Darwin Awards

Man 'walks off cliff and plummets 60 feet to his death on Christmas Day while distracted by his cell phone'

Let this be a lesson to all you folks who never put your cell phone down. I dedicate this silly poem to you: 

Cell Phone Advice 

That Sam I Am, that Sam I Am
I do not like that Sam I Am.
His cell phone is his favorite friend
No time with real friends to spend.
So here's a message to you all
Watch out for that last fatal call. 
And...put away your cell phone quick
Before it makes you dead or sick.

Do not use it near a cliff,
Do not use it and weight lift,
Do not use it in the pool,
Do not use it near a bull,
Do not use it while you ski,
Do not use it working bees,
Do not use it while you drive
If you want to stay alive. 
And if you want a happy day,
Put your d*** cell phone away.